"I'm coming!" I shouted at Sarah. Now that I write it down, it seems a little odd, what did I think she was going to say? 'oh that's fine mother, jolly good show'? She is just a baby after all.
She once again let out a weak cry.
What seemed like a life time later, it was finished. Thank the lord. I sat for a while, admiring my excellent taste in nappies. It had a pig on it. But not any old pig, no sir, it was a blue pig. I know right!? cool or what!?
THUD THUD THUD!
Came the noise of the door.
" Damn it," I muttered I had forgotten about the social workers visit. I glanced over at Sarah in her crib, my sleeping angel.
"I'm coming!" I yelled at the closed door. I had to make disposal of the nappy. I ran to the kitchen, to the bin, it was full. I cursed to myself. "What am I supposed to do with this!?" I pondered, holding it away from my face as if it was a weapon. I was ignorant of anywhere else I could put it. This led to an idea. The window. I rushed to the window, sliding it oped a foot or so, I flung it out. I watched as it fell 11 floors, the blue pig, spinning. Flying.
" Hello miss Danton" She said, painting a fake smile on her face. She stepped in, un invited. And when she turned her back I was sure to stick my tongue out at her. Her face scrunched up like a dogs bottom she sighed
" We are looking around..." I said as a drifted through the room picking up laundry and clearing space "...you know to find that right place"
She wrote something down on her clip board, I couldn't see.
"Tea?" I asked
" Coffee" She replied... I felt like saying ' I said tea, that meant tea!' Despite my view I went to the kitchen to make her the awkward beverage.
I didn't see the banana skin on the floor, nor did I see the door frame. I tripped over the door frame, trying helplessly to regain balance. To then only step onto the banana skin and slip, this time uselessly, well at least I blacked out with style...
" You had quite the fall miss Danton" The social worker conversed as the doctor prodded me with anything he could find in the room. That's when the realization hit me.
" Where's Sarah?" I panicked.
" Don't worry miss-"
" That is fine m- Electra" She continued " Sarah is safe in the hands of my colleagues" She assured me. She looked at her clip board. I was really beginning to dislike that clip board. By this time the doctor was standing at a distance poking me with what appeared to be a TV aerial. Once again the social worker peered down at her clip-board, then looking back up at me, to then return her gaze at the board
" Electra Danton..." She began to say just in time. I hate it when people use my full name, it usually meant that I had done something wrong, or somebody was going to give me a lecture on how spitting in people's drinks or that cats were not invented to dye pink. " This is quite impressive" She interrupted my thoughts.
" What's impressive?" I asked, now fairly curious.
" These tests show an extreme fertility rate" She continued. Why was she telling me this? " Have you ever considered becoming a challenge mother?"
" I- me? you think that I could be a challenge mother?" I was seriously surprised by her proposal.
" Yes, obviously you wouldn't be alone, you will have me, and of course other challenge mothers behind you. You should also get an agent"
" An agent!? I can't afford a packet of humbugs, never mind an agent... or even a house!"
" Well..." She said as she flicked a piece of invisible dust off of her collar " Iv'e had some experience in the field, and well, with me as your agent your sponsor would fund your house-hold" This was all going so fast, I didn't actually know what was happening, did this mean I was hired? Was I now some sort of celebrity? My train of thought was interrupted once again by the doctor now prodding me with the end of a plant-pot.
" I'll see you later to organize housing arrangements, in the mean time, get busy" She shot me a wink, then skipped out of the room. It took me a while to realize what she was implying but when the doctor disturbed me with a coat hanger, I soon realized. He was fairly cute, nice green hair, pretty brown eyes. What the heck!.
The now rather shaken up doctor was stumbling out of the room just as the social worker- well I guess I should probably start calling her Debbie- was entering.
" As ever" I replied, still rather startled by this sudden movement in life. She showed me to her car, it was a black-jag, it was shiny, and I have to say, I didn't mind being recognized in this car. The car pulled up just a few miles away from the hospital. And as I peered through the blackened windows, I saw my new home.
I stepped out of the jag and stared in amazement at my house. So many sights! I ran around getting exited about everything...
" Is that my car!?" I shouted at Debbie as I stocked my new convertible " It's red! oh my! Is that a pool!? I have always wanted a pool! And oh.. You didn't..." My eyes went wide as I gazed at Debbie " Is that a curly tree!?" She nodded and smiled " I really like that curly tree"
" We haven't been inside yet Electra" Debbie tried to get through to me
" Yes, yes, inside, like a normal person... inside" Inside was just as nice, perfect for raising a family. A large family, a family of 100, MY family of 100!
Sorry about the bad quality of pictures and writing and my terrible sense of humor.
I would like to say one last thank you to my bast friend, without whom this challenge would not be... (I named the child after you by the way)
Any comments would be appreciated, even bad ones. But that does not give you permission to throw things or give my computer a virus, just.... behave...